Gib and I do lots of stuff together. We have many overlapping hobbies, but enjoy different aspects of the same interest, but we can still function independently, do our own thing. Since going back to karate a few weeks ago and with my PhD workload shifting for preparation for recruitment of participants and running experiments, and also Gib starting an awesome new role at his work with ridiculously early starts and some long hours (I'm a morning person, but 5:30am is a rude time to be awake) it's been a struggle to keep up. Gib and I used to head to karate together, but with his new work hours it's just not possible, as he needs to be in bed at the time I'm getting home from training. Our house cleaning routine and cooking routine, where we cook meals together and thus have time to catch up on each other's news and discuss cool things, is out of kilter too (although strangely, the house is tidier and more organised than it's ever been).
The multiple changes to our routine and more time apart than usual is making our little abode a mad house. We're tired, stressed and cranky. But on the plus side, neither of us have any struggles discussing anything, so despite our crankiness we've been nutting out battle plans to overcome and work around these new and exciting times. I honestly don't know how people do it all with kids too. How do you people do it?!
Yes, sometimes it does feel like I'm balanced precariously and I really have to keep my s*** together or I'll be falling down that sheer drop below. Photo from here.
11 comments:
I feel like I am constantly on this battle at the moment. I am glad I am not the only one feeling a little stretched.
Good luck with all your work load.
Oh what a great picture!
I'm sure you will fit back into a balance that incorporates all the latest changes....that's the problem, things always change, just when you thought you had the balance about right!
Hope u get the balance right, its always tough
sounds like you have a lot of new routines to adjust to.I'm sure it will all fall into place after a while. At least you are good negotiators.
loving the working together aspect. any hints on how that works?
trasha - it's tough, but it comes down to communication for us. We make sure the door is always open on *any* issue, *especially* the uncomfortable ones (from things inside our relationship to ethics, religion, education...). It's hard to talk about the hard things (sometimes ends in tears ;-D) but we try to keep it practical and objective rather than personal. We discuss any foreseeable problems, any current problems e.g. we like to spend X period of time together, your new work hours are X, my new work/training hours are Y, how are we going to adjust our routine to fit it in? It sounds dry, but it has meant, so far, less emotional conflict and stress in the long run.
It will take a little while but you will find a routine. Make some time to come together - maybe a night each week to plan something, even if it's a lazy dinner and a movie. Wish we could do it at our house. Even when we think we're about to have a tiny moment just for a cup of tea a teen - or hoard of them - plonks themselves down as well. Their timing is unbelievable.
Ta for the mould removing site. I'll have a good look and check out some of the chemical suggestions if some softer options don't work.
What a great picture! Work life balance is a life long WIP I think!
I was just going to say what Bek did, finding balance is a constant work in progress. I think that once you do get it, something else comes along, but that's one of the exciting things about life.
Good luck finding your balance.
I love that picture - I think it sums up your (and mine) situation perfectly - and made me laugh to boot.
Hang on there - things will smooth out eventually - Im sure.
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